How honest should I be?

How honest should I be? What a dreadful week, barely an order in sight. It's been one of those weeks when I've considered popping down to Tesco to ask for a job but then I saw in the paper today that yesterday £5bn was wiped off the value of Tesco due to losses over Christmas. I think they are doing even worse than me! Apart from not making any money, everything else is going well. I was delighted to find that my pretty Violet Tree spider's egg sac has produced lots of babies and my second one has an egg sac yet to hatch. I 'think' my Golden Starburst Baboon spider is fully adult so I intend to introduce her to the male this weekend. Fingers crossed it will go ok, they are not the friendliest of spiders. I won't be sticking my hand in with them if things go wrong but I will be standing by with the plastic tumbler to pop on top of either spider if necessary. I have been working on several ideas that I had before Christmas. If you are reading this blog then you have probably noticed that I am once again allowing visitors into my bug house. I have decided to stick with Saturdays only because I don't send out orders on a Friday and will therefore be able to clear up. During the week I can barely move out there for boxes and other things stacked on the floor, I can't expect visitors to step over everything and fit between the tanks and cages. I can't have open days anymore because I am generally on my own, my husband is often at work and now that our daughter has finished college and is at work during the week, I don't think it is fair to expect her to help me at the weekends. If the bugs were indoors it would be much easier but being at the end of the garden, I can't logistically cope with more than one visitor/group of visitors at a time. I therefore need to have callers by appointment, I know from past experience that this isn't popular but I can't see any other way. It was so much easier when I lived in London and had the underground station nearby, open afternoons were so well attended that I could afford to pay someone to help me. Lovely as it is here in leafy Buckinghamshire, the public transport is useless. I'm always saying that Flackwell Heath village would be perfect if it had an underground station and a swimming pool (yes, I like swimming, I'm not very good at it but I like it).

With sales being so slow it is scary re-stocking too much. There is only me to feed and clean all these creatures. I must have the only job in the world where I have to work harder when no orders are coming in! I often look around and think "I'm running a mini zoo with no visitors", oh how I wish I were salaried. I would be perfectly happy doing all this work if I was being paid for it. I also spend so much time on the computer, answering the same questions over and over again. I hate to ignore emails but I know I should at times and just sometimes I do hit that 'delete' button. I am not complaining about genuine questions and emails. I like people to ask the size of a spider before ordering, I am perfectly happy to measure them before you order. I especially like all the nice little emails that I get saying thank you for my order, everything arrived safely. I often send extra bugs where I can (generally animals that I have bred myself). I know that people have choices about where they order from and I have never been more grateful of those people ordering from me at this dreadful economic time. I was chatting to my daughter yesterday and saying that so many retail businesses are going under but the first people hear of it, is when it has actually closed. Most businesses can't moan like me, they have to keep quiet or their credit rating will be shot. I'm just me, I don't employ anyone, I don't owe anyone any money, if I decide to call it a day then nobody loses out but me! That said I have been going for 30 years now and I anticipate going for at least another 10 (probably much longer as I don't have a pension). My extended family have been relaying all my good points to me this week and suggesting other jobs that I could work in but I am sticking with what I know. My daughter now works in recruitment but wouldn't dare suggest another job and my husband knows that my passion in life is animals and although I'm sure I could look after people for a living, I prefer six legged, eight legged or four legged creatures.

I am being offered so many wonderful spiders and bugs right now (for obvious reasons). I cannot resist so I am still restocking with gusto. I have lots of great new spiders and next week I am expecting Leaf insects and Bush crickets. I will be attending a bug exhibition at the end of the month so I expect to pick up some great bargains there.

That's it, must get on, lots of spiders to feed today. It is Friday 13th but the sun is shining and I am going for a massage this afternoon (I need and deserve it).